Grief is a bit like being sucked into a vacuum. The brush has pulled you under and in, and it's out of your control. You feel like you've entered a whole new place. Everyone on the outside appears to be going about business as usual, and you wonder if they notice you're covered in dust. As horrible as that may be, it's good. Grief is good because it pulls you through. It forces you to take a look at how you feel. It pushes you through the sadness that would overtake you if you were left where you were right after a profound loss. Of a person, or a place, or a way of being that felt like home. Something is gone, sucking you into a period of grieving.
Grief will not let you stay in one of the ugliest places you could stay. Swallowed.
The churning inside and the rush of memories is too much to ignore. So you are pushed forward, heels dragging in the dirt, thanks to grief.
Because of grief, you press on, thinking the thoughts you might have been too afraid to think. Feeling things you wouldn't have allowed yourself to feel without it.
Thank you, grief. Thank you, God. You knew there would be healing because of grief.